yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
