that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
