haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
