she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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