I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Are we still banned from the library?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
