is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
