dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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