Whod you bang
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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