At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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