return my video game
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
