I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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