I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
where am i from again
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
