Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(778): View more from British Columbia

tonight, alcohol would be proud of us

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(773): View more from Illinois

im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real

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(440): View more from Ohio

But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness

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(203): View more from Connecticut

i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong

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(502): View more from Kentucky

I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?

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(760): View more from California

I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.

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