we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Randomize