I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Randomize
