As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize