3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
