Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Randomize
