she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
