If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
