haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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