I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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