lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
