you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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