I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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