what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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