I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
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