We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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