Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
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