I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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