...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
