Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize