In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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