there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
