Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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