you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
