I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize