i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Just invented taco cereal.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
