whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Randomize