My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
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