I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
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