you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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