the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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