Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
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