he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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