question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
