just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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