Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
