ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
