im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
i out mim tonsoeep
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