Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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